You Are My Life
by NellyLove
Summary: Her favorite song was by Michael Jackson. He was her best friend. He was supposed to know that. Maybe if he had, she wouldn't have left. Maybe he only did like things when they were forbidden. Maybe he just couldn't love her. John Morrison/OC/CM Punk
1. Someone In the Dark

**I know...i shouldn't be starting another fic! LOL! But i just got smacked in the face with inspiration today and my Jomo Muse said 'write me dammit' hence...you get this wonderful Jomo fic! woo!**

**This is my tribute to a pop/music icon. Michael Jackson. Much love to his family. I respect him as an artist and you have to admit his music was just fabulous. I'm a fan of all of his songs!  
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**Also, Most(maybe all) chapters will be songfics...and they'll all together create a story...each one leads into the other and they all correspond...so it's just a regular fic pretty much. Every chapter is to a Michael Jackson song(hence it is my MJ tribute) **

**Anyways..please leave a REVIEW because REVIEWS=LOVE! and VOTE on my NEW poll...Also, this triangle was on my last poll and i wanted to write it, so i did! woo!**

**ENJOY! I only own Janelle Logan, nothing else!**

**xoxoxo**

**Angel  
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_**Song by Michael Jackson**_

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_**Chapter 1: Someone In the Dark**_

_All alone wishing on stars_

_waiting for you to find me_

_one sweet night I knew I would see_

_a stranger who'd be my friend _

The night I fell in love with John Hennigan aka John Morrison, I was standing alone out in a parking lot. In the freezing cold, waiting for my boyfriend. Yes, my boyfriend. Phil Brooks. I had met John briefly before and maybe we had possibly chatted a bit, but we didn't really know each other, know each other. If you get what I mean.

I was supposed to be meeting Phil. But he was running late after an ECW/SmackDown taping. I was outside the arena, leaning up against it's brick wall, looking up at the stars. Wishing on said stars and hoping I could spend more time with Phil. I only saw him for days at a time before he had to leave again and go on the road.

And he would never take me with him. I wanted to go, but he said it would be a bad idea. I wonder why? I looked up at the stars and finally realized that what I wanted wasn't to spend time with Phil. It was to find a true friend, someone I could meet and talk to and someone who always had time for me. Someone who worked their schedule around me. Not worked me into his schedule.

_when someone in the dark reaches out to you _

_and touches off a spark that comes shining through _

_it tells you never be afraid_

_then somewhere in your heart you can feel the glow_

_a light to keep you warm when the night winds blow_

_like it was written in the stars I knew_

_my friend, my someone in the dark was you_

I sighed softly to myself. "Hey," a voice said quietly and I instantly jumped. "Holy crap! Could you give a girl some kind of warning?" I asked laughing as I turned to see John standing not far off behind me. He had just walked out of the arena, with his duffel bag slung over his shoulder. "Sorry, hi Janelle," he smirked slightly but it turned into a smile.

"Hello John," I said politely before leaning back against the wall. I sighed and looked back at John. He hadn't left yet. "Phil can't meet me, I take it," I said in a slight mutter. John nodded slowly. "He's really busy, sorry Janie," John apologized for him. I rolled my eyes, "don't apologize for something you can't control," I told him, pushing off of the wall and walking towards him.

I ran a hand over my face. "God, why do I feel as if he doesn't care about me?" I asked quietly. "He does car Janie, I know that," he whispered, hugging me. And when his skin touched mine, I felt a shock run up and down, waking up and heightening all of my senses.

"Do you want to hang out with me since Phil can't?" he asked. I smiled slightly as I pulled back. I felt as if I were glowing. It was freezing cold outside, but when I was touching John, I felt as if a fuzzy warm blanket had been draped over me. And that's when I knew, I had gotten my wish. I had found that friend I wanted so desperately.

_promise me we'll always be_

_walking the world together_

_hand in hand where dreams never end _

_my star secret friend and me_

After that, John and I always hung out. I never told him about how I wished for a friend that night. It would sound weird and childish to him, I know it. But whenever I saw him, I couldn't help but smile. But each time we saw each other we became closer and closer. And then Phil started complaining that I spent more time with John than him.

But I don't really think he minded. It meant more time for him to do whatever he does when he misses our dates. And whenever he misses them, John shows up in his place. The other day he made me promise we'd always be friends. I know, we sound like little kids but it's true.

And I think John is drawn to forbidden things. Whenever we're not around Phil, he's way more affectionate. He likes the danger of us maybe being caught looking as if we're more than friends. He always holds my hand when we walk. But he swears I'm just his best friend. And that there's nothing more than that.

But I wish there was. I don't want him to be my best friend forever.

_when someone in the dark reaches out to you _

_and touches off a spark that comes shining through _

_it tells you never be afraid_

_then somewhere in your heart you can feel the glow_

_a light to keep you warm when the night winds blow_

I remember the night John dared to do something that Phil would hate.

_"C'mon Janie! Come on the road with me. It will be great. I'll have someone to talk to. You won't have to be alone. And you'll see Phil a whole lot more," John begged, giving me is puppy dog face. I shook my head, "it's Phil that makes me say no to this. He doesn't want me on the road," I said sadly. "So, then come because I want you there," he said. And yet again the thought that he liked forbidden things crossed my mind._

_And I figured, sure, if he wants something forbidden. He can have it. After a few minutes I sighed. "Fine....I'll go on the road with you. But if Phil gets pissed, I'm sicking him on your ass," I said, cocking an eyebrow. His face lit up as he squeezed my hand. An electric shock ran up my arm, just like every time he touched me. It was nothing new._

_He seemed to be glowing, he was so excited about me coming on the road with him. His happiness rubbed off on me and I broke out into a grin..._

_look for the rainbow in the sky_

_I believe you and I could never really say goodbye_

_wherever you may be I'll look up and see_

_someone in the dark for me_

_wherever you may be I'll look up and see_

_someone in the dark for me_

The first day on the road with John, he kept me a secret from Phil. Instead he took me out to lunch. And it ended up down pouring. And we had decided to walk to the restaurant. Sitting by the window in the small cafe I had laughed at the heavy drops of rain.

_"Perfect," John muttered. I grinned cheekily at him, "it's just a little rain, Johnny. Nothing to worry about," I said. He shook his head. "Yeah, yeah," he mumbled and finally smiled back at me._

After the rain had let up that day, we had walked back. A huge bright rainbow had been coloring the sky then, just like today. I was back home in California, and it had just stopped raining. I was walking aimlessly in the park, staring up at the huge rainbow. And yet another cheesy moment with John popped into my head.

_It was on the walk back to the hotel that he pointed up at the sky. At the huge rainbow. "Whenever I see a rainbow, I'm gonna remember this day and think of you." he said, a whisper in my ear. I looked at him with a grin, "and when I look up and see the rainbow I'll know that you're waiting for me," and with that quick comment I dashed off down the street. I heard him chuckle a little shocked and confused before chasing after me._

I never thought I could say goodbye to John.

_though you're gone star far away_

_each time I see a rainbow_

_I'll remember being with you_

_smiles coming through my tears _

But then, Phil found out I was there. He told me to go home immediately. I obeyed my boyfriend, much to the disappointment of John. He drove me to the airport.

_"I'll see you when I can. Okay?" John said, pulling me away at arms length. I nodded, "Yeah, Johnny, hopefully that'll be soon," I murmured. "It will, I promise," he whispered kissing my forehead. He didn't have to hid his affections, Phil wasn't here. We had said goodbye at the hotel. My flight was called, I hugged John one last time before boarding the flight back to Oakland._

Now looking up at the sky and seeing that rainbow I remember that day too. And I smiled through my tears, which had come to my eyes, unknowingly. Even though he was far away I still think of him. He was my best friend.

_when someone in the dark reaches out to you _

_and touches off a spark that comes shining through _

_it tells you never be afraid_

_then somewhere in your heart you can feel the glow_

_a light to keep you warm when the night winds blow_

And now, Phil was finally agreeing to let me go on the road with him. But I had to stay with him, not John. Which was a slight downfall. But I'd still see my best friend all the time, hopefully. But I won't forget anytime soon how I feel when I'm around John. When I touch him a shock of electricity runs through my body. I glow, and I'm not afraid to let him in. And I'm filled with a warm sensation that I never get from Phil.

_look for the rainbow in the sky_

_I believe you and I could never really say goodbye_

_wherever you may be I'll look up and see_

_someone in the dark for me_

_wherever you may be I'll look up and see_

_someone in the dark for me..._

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_**Tell me what ya think! Keep it, kick it?**_


	2. Just Good Friends

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**Alright, obviously deciding to keep this fic around! I'm actually really liking it! So, i hope you do as well! ENJOY!**

**please leave a REVIEW because REVIEWS=LOVE! and VOTE no my NEW POLL! thanks to everyone who has reviewed the first chapter! you guys rock!!!!**

**xoxoxo**

**Angel  
**

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_**Song by Michael Jackson**_

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_**Chapter 2- Just Good Friends **_

_I watched you on the floor_

_cheek to cheek , she's getting to you_

_you didn't see-her eyes on me-no _

_she looked right through you _

_(before you make) before you make_

_(a big mistake) remember _

_that looks can fool you babe, Hee!_

_John's POV_

Janie had been on the road with Phil now for almost 3 months. Phil was okay with our friendship. But what he didn't know is that us, me and Janie, were a bit more than just friends. I could tell we were attracted to each other. Hell, I could barely ever get her out of my head.

And for some reason I wanted my best friends girlfriend. Low, dirty, messed up as it is, I wanted her. Badly. And I knew she wanted me too. But there really was no logic behind why I wanted her. I just did, it was impulsive. But I couldn't help it. And after the incident yesterday, things just seemed to get worse for me.

_"Hey Phil!" Mike called as we walked into his open locker room. We froze when we saw Phil with Janelle pressed up against the wall. His hand was up her shirt, her fingers tugging at his belt. "Whoa! Hello! Lock your door if you're gonna do that!" Mike shouted._

_I didn't hear him. My eyes had been connected with Janie's. Phil ignored Mike, thinking that we'd just eventually leave. Janie reciprocated to his actions, but she wasn't looking at him. Actually, she was looking right through him. Her eyes were on me, and Phil didn't see that. No one did but me. Janie's eyes eventually flickered back to Phil as she pulled away. "Phil, the guys are here," she said, pointing vaguely at Mike and I. She met my eyes for a brief moment before looking away. _

I wouldn't admit it to anyone but myself, but when I saw Phil kissing her and treating her so roughly, my blood began to boil. She deserved to be treated and touched as if she were a princess. She deserved the gentleness and fondness I could give her. Wait, _I _could give her. Well, I guess that's really what I wanted.

_There's something I would_

_sure appreciate _

_(If you can keep a secret)_

Mike walked into my locker room and I didn't even hear him. "HEEEELLLLOOO!" he yelled right in my ear. I instinctively reached out and punched him in the gut. He doubled over, "ouch! What the fuck man!" he whined. I shrugged, "you should know better." He shot me a glare and I just smirked.

"What are you thinking about anyway?" he questioned curiously. I sighed, "truthfully, Janie." I mumbled. "What? Why?" he asked. I rolled my eyes. "Can you keep a secret Mike?" I asked him. He shrugged, "yeah, I guess I could." He shrugged nonchalantly. "I'd really appreciate it," I said in all seriousness.

Mike noticed and nodded, serious as well.

_baby loves me_

_but she never shows she cares_

_(No, you won't see her kiss or hug me)_

_baby loves me_

_no she acts like I'm not there_

_(that doesn't mean she doesn't love me-Ooo)_

"Janie loves me." I said simply after a moment of hesitation. I glowered when Mike burst out laughing. He saw my glare and stopped abruptly. "What? You expect me to believe that? She's with Phil, why would she love you?" he asked with an innocent shrug.

"Because he doesn't give a shit about her!" I growled. "Mike, you know just like I do that before Phil decided to bring Janie on the road that he was sleeping with Maria. He was _cheating _on Janie," I said angrily. Mike looked at me, "John, I don't know what to tell you."

We were quiet for a while. "Do you know for sure?" he asked curiously. I sighed, "did you not see her earlier when we walked into the locker room? She stared at me the whole time we were there. She looked right through Phil, to me!" I said insistently. "Are you sure you aren't just 'wishing' she loved you? Maybe you're delusional?" Mike suggested.

I glared at him darkly, "alright, alright. I get it, she loves you." He still didn't believe me. I sighed. "She never shows extreme affection toward you when anyone else is—OH! Oh! I get it!" Mike said excitedly. I rolled my eyes. "So is she cheating on Phil with you?" he questioned. I shook my head, "not really. I mean.." I trailed off.

"Have you two slept together?" he asked. My head jerked up suddenly, "NO!" I yelled. Mike cringed, "okay, just asking." I rolled my eyes again, "no one ever sees us when she kisses and hugs me. She loves me, but when we're around other people, she acts like I'm not there. Because she really loves Phil too," I muttered.

"And just because she acts like that doesn't mean she doesn't leave me. It means that she might, and I think she does." I stated. Mike just nodded like the idiot he is.

_if they ask her_

_tell 'em that we're just _

_good friends _

_just good friends _

_just good friends _

"And whenever someone asks about you two?" Mike asked wonderingly. "She tells everyone we're just good friends." I smirked at that. I told everyone the same thing. "We're just good friends," I murmured. Mike cocked an eyebrow, confused.

_you better take advice_

_never trust-first impressions_

_I tried to hide this affair_

_from their suspicions_

Later that night I ran into Janie. She was sitting in my locker room when I came back from my match. "Hey," I greeted as I grabbed my towel off the rack on my locker. "Hi Johnny," she greeted with a slight smile. I looked at her confused, "what's wrong, Janie?" he asked. She shook her head, "Oh, nothing," she murmured, thoughtfully.

I couldn't help but notice how beautiful she looked. Her light brown hair tumbling down her shoulders, her bangs pinned into one of those little bump things at the top of her head. She stood up and walked over to me slowly. "John, I was thinking today," she started. I cocked an eyebrow, "about what?" I asked. She grinned slightly, "us." and then she pressed her lips against mine.

I instantly wrapped my arms around her, caressing the side of her face, pulling her closer to me. As close as humanly possible. He hands explored my bare chest that she was crushed against before she wrapped her arms around my shoulders.

We pulled away, both of us panting for breath. "Us." I repeated and she nodded with a devilish grin. A grin I loved on her angelic face. She kissed me softly, "yeah, us. I—," I met her eyes, "behind his back?" I asked. She looked away guiltily. "This is where I thought you'd turn me down," she sighed. "I can't leave him John, he'll figure it out too quickly," she muttered.

"But soon?" I asked hopefully, she looked up and smiled with a nod.

_so even if she's asking you to stay_

_you better know where you stand_

_(you better know where you stand)_

We had stayed in the locker room for the rest of the night. Just talking and asking questions. "What's your favorite song?" I asked, I had never asked her that before. She thought for a second before grinning and stating, "Thriller by Michael Jackson." I laughed at the look on her voice, "you're so adorable," I murmured, kissing her again.

My phone started ringing and I sighed. I reached into my pocket and pull the phone out. "Yeah Mike?" I asked. _"Come out with the guys tonight! Phil said Janie is gonna hang out with the girls so he's coming! Our group hasn't been together as a whole for a long time! You have to come!" _"Mike, um...I guess I'll go."

Janie shot me a questioning look, I just shook my head slightly. I didn't listen to what Mike said after that then hung up. "The guys want me to go out," I said. Janie frowned and sighed. "Please stay?" she asked.

I studied her. But I knew where I stood, she was still with Phil. I had no real obligation to stay. "Nah, I need to catch up with them. It's been forever since we've had a guys' night out. Go hang with Melina and Nattie," I told her. She smiled sadly and nodded, "yeah, I'll see you later then?" she asked.

I nodded. She got up and walked out of the locker room.

_baby loves me_

_but she never shows she cares_

_(No, you won't see her kiss or hug me)_

_baby loves me_

_no she acts like I'm not there_

_(that doesn't mean she doesn't love me-Ooo)_

Now I was pretty damn sure she loved me. After all of that, I think so. And now, a month or two had passed and we were still secretly seeing each other. We were together whenever we possibly could be. And so far, no one knew about us. We were doing a good job with covering our tracks.

She was standing, with her arm looped through Phil's. She said hi, and that was it. Not showing that she cared about me. Phil would never see her kissing or hugging me. But I knew that there would be some time tonight when I would get the chance to hold her, and he probably wouldn't. Not the way I'd get to. We stood there; me, Mike, Phil, Janie, TJ, DH, and Nattie.

Janie didn't point me out or talk to me specifically. She was practically acting like I wasn't there. But I saw her sneaky glances at me and I knew that just because she was acting that way didn't we she didn't care.

_now if they ask _

_just tell 'em we're just good friends..._

_yes...just good friends _

_(just good friends)_

_just good friends _

_Listen up, we've got a problem here_

Later that night I overheard a conversation between Janie and Nattie. "So what's up with you and John?" the Canadian asked. "Hennigan?" Janie asked, just to clarify. Nattie made a small "mhm," noise. "Nothing, John and I are just good friends," she told her girlfriend.

Nattie took that as a good enough answer because she left after that. I round the corner, and made sure no one was watching, before I pulled Janie into my arms and kissed her passionately. She grinned as we pulled apart. "Just good friends, huh?" I asked.

"What was I supposed to tell her?" she countered, cocking an eyebrow. I chuckled, "but we've got a problem baby," I said. She looked at me nervously. "I think Phil is getting suspicious," I told her. She sighed, "god it took him long to notice _something._" she muttered. I rolled my eyes with a frown. "John, don't worry about Phil. We're taking a break...We got into an...argument." she said softly.

My eyes widened in shock as I took her chin in my hand and made her look up at me. "What about, and are you okay?" I asked. She smiled ruefully. "About you, and I'm fine." she answered. My eyebrows furrowed. "He told me to choose. You or Phil, and I couldn't do that, so he said we should take a break." she answered. Thank god.

_I can see the signs_

_Phil's POV_

How could I be so stupid. How could I just start noticing all this now. Those two! One of my closest friends! And they say they're just 'good friends' bull shit! It's more like 'fuck buddies!'

I was beyond pissed now that I was seeing the signs. _How long has she been cheating? _I wondered.

_I guess the lady_

_is still making up her mind_

_(mind)_

_(Say we're just good friends)_

_2 Weeks later..._

I was surprised she hadn't come back to me yet. I guess she was still making up her mind on who she was going to choose. As far as I knew, she hadn't been seen with John at all. So, she was single and not moving on; perfect.

_baby loves me_

_but she never shows she cares_

_(No, you won't see her kiss and hug me)_

_(just good friends)_

_(baby loves me)_

_John's POV_

I saw it; the way Phil was looking at her. And I knew he was going to try to get back with her. But now, I couldn't let him get her back. She was finally going to be mine, she was finally fully getting over the break up. I couldn't let him come in and scoop her into his arms and carry her away. Never.

"Hey, Phil, wait up man," I said, calling to the Straightedge Superstar. Said man stopped in his tracks and turned to face me. "Oh, hey John," he muttered. "You know, I just had to tell you something," I figured I'd get right to the point. "And what's that?" Phil asked. I smirked. "Janie loves me. Though she used to act like she didn't care about me, you never saw her kissing and hugging me." I stated.

Phil glared darkly at me but I continued, "we may saw we're 'just good friends' but she loves _me _Phil." I told him the truth. I guess he deserved to know.

_though she acts like I'm not there_

_you doggone lover, hee!_

"So she's been cheating on me? I knew it," Phil muttered shaking his head. I studied him intently waiting for some kind of explosive cuss out, it never came. And I was shocked, to say the least. I was her lover and he didn't want to punch me in the face.

Maybe he wanted to, he didn't.

_Don't you wanna know _

_my baby loves me_

_though she never shows she cares_

_(never shows she cares)_

_Phil's POV_

So she was in love with him. That didn't surprise me. But that didn't mean I was going to give up on her. So, I wasn't going to attack John like I really wanted to. Because if I did, it'd give Janie a reason to hate me and not come back to me.

They covered themselves and their affair up well. She never showed she cared for him, but she obviously does.

_She doesn't kiss and hug me_

That's why toward the end of our relationship, before we broke up that she wasn't kissing and hugging me. She was giving him all of her affection. But, like I said, I wasn't going to give up. She would be mine again.

I wasn't going to give up. She loved me, I knew that. I didn't care if she loved John too. She would be mine again.

_my baby loves me_

_she love me, she love me_

_(never shows she cares)..._


	3. The Girl Is Mine

**Here is chapter 3!!! The whistle go whoo whoo! If you live in Cali and watch YouTube, you know what that means...**

**anyways....please leave a REVIEW because REVIEWS=LOVE! thanks to everyone who has reviewed so far! You guys are AWESOME!!!**

**xoxoxo**

**Angel  
**

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_**Song by Michael Jackson & Paul McCartney**_

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_**Chapter 3- The Girl Is Mine**_

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_Every night she walks right in my dreams_

_since I met her from the start_

_I'm so proud I am the only one_

_who is special in her heart_

_John's POV_

Janie and I still weren't together. She wanted some time to herself after her break up with Phil. She wanted to think over everything. And it was beginning to worry me. Because the more she thought, the more reasons she could come up with to go back to Phil. And the longer we wait to get together, the more time Phil has to try to get her back.

A few weeks ago she met with Stephanie McMahon. Steph had fallen instantly in love with her and gave her a job as a Creative Writer for SmackDown. So Janie was staying down the hall from me, in her own room by herself. But here, lying in my bed, I was finding it hard to sleep.

I dozed off but I couldn't even escape her then. She walked in my dreams. Her smiling face, her graceful body. And I wake up again. I wanted just moment without thinking about her. But ever since I met her outside that arena, she has been the center of my dreams.

But truthfully, she's told me I'm the only one special in her heart. And I'm proud of that. And when she woke up tomorrow morning, there'd be a bouquet of roses waiting for her.

_the girl is mine_

_the doggone girl is mine_

_I know she's mine _

_because the doggone girl is mine_

To myself, I'm pretty sure she's already mine. She'd been Phil's for so long, I thought it'd never happen. But I know she's mine now.

The next day was a SmackDown taping. So I got up early, went to the gym, then headed to the arena. When I got into my locker room. I found out I was sharing it with Phil. He sent me a hostile glare as I set my bag down. We didn't even say 'hi' or anything.

"She's mine, Phil," I said quietly. He turned to face me, narrowing his eyes.

_I don't understand the way you think_

_saying that she's yours not mine_

_sending roses and your silly dreams_

_really just a waste of time_

_Phil's POV_

I scoffed and shook my head. "I don't understand the way you think John." I rolled my eyes. "You say she's yours, not mine." I glared at him, "sending her roses and helping her get a job for the WWE." I walked around the room, and we were slowly circling each other.

"It's all really just a wast of time John. She's going to come back to me," I said with an edge of certainty in my voice.

_because she's mine_

_the doggone girl is mine_

_don't waste your time _

_because the doggone girl is mine_

"Because Janie is mine. She's always been mine. And the reason she hasn't gotten with you yet is because she still loves me. So don't waste your time. She's mine, for now and forever," I said, crossing my arms over my chest.

"What are you two talking about!" a voice yelled as Janie stumbled into the room. John and I both stared at her before going offensive. She was close to tears already.

_I love you more than he_

_(take you anywhere)_

I got in first. "I love you more than John. I'll take you anywhere you want to go." I yelled, throwing my hand out at John, and pointing to myself. She shook her head and wrapped her arms around her waist. Staring at us with pain-filled eyes.

_but I love you endlessly_

_(loving we will share)_

_so come and go with me_

_to one town_

"But I'll love you forever. I'm willing to share every aspect of my life with you," John burst in, pleading with her. His eyes desperate. Janie bit her lip. "So come with me," John said quietly as she took a step toward him.

"No!" I yelled, "she's mine! You can't have her!" I growled.

_but we both cannot have her_

_so it's one or the other_

_and one day you'll discover_

_that she's my girl forever and ever_

_John's POV_

I turned and glared at Phil. "We both can't have her!" I looked to Janie. "It's one or the other," I told her before looking back at the Straightedge Superstar. "One day you'll discover Phil, that she's my girl, forever," I said in a deathly calm voice.

_I don't build your hopes to be let down_

_cause I really feel it's time_

But we weren't done proving who was better. "I won't build your hopes up and let you down! I took us slow and loved you as much as I could. I really feel it's time you came back home," Phil said, nodding slightly at Janie.

She bit down on her lip harder, trying to hold back her tears.

_I know she'll tell you I'm the one for her_

_cause she said I blow her mind_

"Oh know, she'll tell you i'm the one for her Phil. Because she said I _blow her mind_." I growled. "You little asshole!" Phil yelled as he lunged at me and we went down to the floor. Kicking and punching in a flurry of feet and fists. Janie didn't know what to do, she just leaned against the wall, bawling her eyes out.

_the girl is mine_

_the doggone girl is mine_

_don't waste you time_

_because the doggone girl is mine_

The whole time we were fighting we were growling at each other. "She's mine." followed by, "No! She's mine!" and it continued on. Finally we broke apart. "Don't waste your time Phil! Janie is mine!" I yelled, wrapping an arm around her waist. He wouldn't attack me while I was holding her.

_she's mine. She's mine_

_no, no, no, she's mine_

_the girl is mine, the girl is mine_

_the girl is mine, the girl is mine_

_Janie's POV_

I stared at them. Looking from John, to Phil. The two men I loved fighting over me. Going back in forth yelling "She's mine." "She's mine." "No, no, no, she's mine." I felt like a material object, not a person. I felt like a possession.

Not someone who is supposed to be loved and cared for. But John's arm was gentle as he held me next to him. He was fighting for me, when in his view, there really was no hope.

Finally, I couldn't take it anymore. "STOP FIGHTING!" I cried out. They both went silent. "You two have to promise me, that no matter who I chose, it won't ruin your friendship," I said, looking with wide eyes from John, to Phil.

They both took a few moments before nodding. I took a breath, closed my eyes, then opened them slowly. "John."

_the girl is mine, (yep) she's mine_

_the girl is mine, (yep) she's mine_

I saw him grin slightly. He leaned in and kissed me gently. "You're mine," he whispered sweetly in my ear making me grin.

_don't waste your time _

_because the doggone girl is mine_

_the girl is mine, the girl is mine_

John looked back to Phil. "I told you not to waste your time. She's mine." he stated and Phil slowly accepted his defeat. He nodded and smiled slightly. "Okay, I'm fine with that," he said nodding.

_we're not going to fight about this, okay_

John walked over to his friend. Phil placed a hand on his shoulder. "We're not going to fight about this anymore, okay?" he said in all seriousness, but with a smile on his face.

_I think I told you, I'm a lover not a fighter_

John nodded with a smile. "I think I told you, I'm a lover not fighter," he laughed and Phil laughed along. I couldn't help but smile. _They were friends again._

"Guys, I have to go. But I'll see you both later," and with that I left the locker room, pecking John's cheek as I went.

_I've heard it all before_

_she told me that I'm her forever lover, _

_you know, don't you remember_

_John's POV_

I heard Phil sigh and looked at him. "Do you remember when I came to you after she told me I was her forever lover. I was so excited." he said quietly. I nodded, remembering that night.

_well, after loving me_

_she said she couldn't love another_

I grinned and couldn't help but get in another knock. "Well, after loving me, she said she cold never love another," I stated smugly. Phil glanced over at me and raised his eyebrows.

_is that what she said_

"Is that what she said?" He asked, trying to hold back his grin. He knew we were fooling around.

_yes, she said it, you keep dreaming_

I smiled sitting down on the bench. "Yep, that's what she said." I answered.

_I don't believe it_

"I don't believe you," Phil muttered before laughing. I did as well as he left the room. I couldn't wipe the smug smile off my face though. Janie was finally, really all mine. The girl was mine.

But why do I feel as if something has changed?

_the girl is mine(mine, mine, mine)_


	4. The Way You Make Me Feel

**Sorry it took so long to get this up. My Jomo Muse refused to wake up and be written...but he finally did this morning and this is what happened..so sorry if it's not as good as the past 3 chapters, inspiration was on a low...**

**anyways..please leave a REVIEW because REVIEWS=LOVE! thanks to all who have reviewed!**

**And i edited out some lyrics that just kept repeating..so, yeah...  
**

**xoxoxo**

**Angel  
**

* * *

_**Song by Michael Jackson**_

_**Chapter 4- The Way You Make Me Feel**_

_**

* * *

**_

_Hey pretty baby with the high heels on_

_you give me fever like i've never, ever known_

_you're just a product of loveliness_

_I like the groove of your walk_

_your talk, your dress_

_I feel your fever from miles around_

_i'll pick you up in my car_

_and we'll paint the town_

_just kiss me baby and tell me twice_

_that you're the one for me_

_John's POV_

I smiled as I saw Janie walk into the club wearing her red high heels. She was chatting with Nattie and Eve her two best girlfriends on the SmackDown roster. I watched her as the girls walked across the floor over to the bar. Just seeing her dressed in a short skirt, showing off her flawless legs, gave me fever. She was just the epitome of beautiful. Everything about her was absolutely lovely.

She santered over to, a grin on her face. I loved the sway of her walk. "Hey John," she greeted. I loved the sound of her voice. She adjusted her top, so it didn't show as much cleavage. That made me grin. I loved the way she dressed to.

We sat there with the group for an hour or two. But I could tell she was ready to leave. I smiled as I leaned closer to her, "you wanna get out of here?" I asked her. She grinned at me and nodded. I smiled and nodded to the guys. "I think Janie and I are gonna head on out," I said to them. They made a simultaneous sad sound but ingnored us after that.

I took Janie's hand in mine and led her to the entrance of the club. "Wait here, it's rainging out side. I'll pick you up out front," I told her. She nodded as I ran out intot he rain to get my car. I drove up in front of the club and leaned across the front seat to open the door for her as she hurried toward the car. She got in and smiled over at me.

She leaned toward me and kissed me sweetly. I smirked at her as she pulled away. "Tell me that you're the one for me," I whispered to her. I just needed to hear her say it. Because lately, things have been great. But I was just waiting for that shine to wear off. Any tiime now it should happen. "I'm the one for you," she whispered, kissing me again.

_the way you make me feel_

_(the way you make me feel)_

_you really turn me on_

_(you really turn me on)_

_you knock me off my feet_

_(you knock me off my feet)_

_my lonely days are gone_

_(my lonely days are gone)_

She bit her lip as she grinned at me. Giving me that innocent, 'come and get me' look that she knew drove me crazy. She twirled a strand of her light brown hair around a finger as her hazel eyes glinted gold in the darkness of the car.

The way she was looking at me now really turned me on. The way she made me feel by just _looking _at me is crazy. She knocks me off my feet, figuratively not literally. But now, being with her, I know my lonely days are gone.

_I like the feeling you're givin' me_

_just hold me baby and i'm in ecstasy_

_oh i'll be working from nine to five_

_to buy you thinks to keep you by my side_

_I never felt so in love before_

_just promise me baby, you'll love me forevermore_

_I swear i'm keeping you satisfied_

_cause you're the one for me_

I loved the feeling she was giving me. This happiness, this excitement for everyday life. Because i'd be experiencing all of it with her. And just when she held me, wrapped her arms around me and held herself against me, i'm in ecstasy.

I may be working long hours everyday with the WWE. But it's worth it, because then I can spoil her and buy her presents. I know she's not with me for my money, but the expensive gifts are just like insurance that she'll stay by my side.

I may not say it to anyone, but i've never been so selflessly in love before. I want, no I need her to promise me she'll love me forever. I swear i'm keeping her satisfied, because i'd do anything for her. She is the one for me.

_the way you make me feel_

_(the way you make me feel)_

_you really turn me on_

_(you really turn me on)_

_you knock me off my feet_

_now baby-hee!_

_(you knock me off my feet)_

_my lonely days are gone_

_(my lonely days are gone)_

I woke up the next morning with her in my arms. She looked beautiful, hugging the pillow while using it to rest her head on. A slight smile gracing her lips, and he hair splayed across her back. She looked like an angel. A feeling of protectiveness welled up inside of me. I had to protect her, it was my duty to make sure she never got hurt.

She made me feel that way. And it blew me away how head over heels I was for her.

_ain't nobody's business_

_ain't nobody's business_

_(the way you make me feel)_

_ain't nobody's business, _

_ain't nobody's business but _

_mine and my baby_

_(you really turn me on)_

_(you knock me off of my feet)_

_(my lonely days are gone)_

All the guys ask me how I can be dating my best friends ex. But I really don't care what they say. It's none of their business. It's only m business, and Janie's business. And we both want to be together, so we just ignore them.

_give it to me-give me some time_

_(the way you make me feel)_

_come on be my girl- I wanna be with mine_

_(you really turn me on)_

_ain't nobody's business_

_(you knock me off of my feet)_

_ain't nobody's business but mine and my baby's_

The way she made me feel was indescribable. But everything about her turned me on. I was attracted to each and everyone of her perks as well as her flaws. She was beautiful but humanly plain as well, which made her all that more gorgeous. Inside and out. I wanted nothing more than to be with her, I would no longer be lonely.

_(the way you make me feel)_

_(you really turn me on)_

_(you knock me off my feet)_

_(my lonely days are gone)_


	5. Speechless

**Alright, joy! A chappy! lol! Jomo Muse woke up during SmackDown earlier and i decided to start this chappy! so ENJOY!**

**So, this is starting to get good...so be ready for some drama coming up soon!**

**please leave a REVIEW because REVIEWS=LOVE! thanks to everyone who has reviewed! go vote on my poll!**

**xoxoxo**

**Angel  
**

* * *

_**Song by Michael Jackson **_

_**Chapter 5- Speechless **_

_**

* * *

**_

_Your love is magical, that's how I feel_

_but I have not the words here to explain _

_gone is the grace for expressions of passion _

_but there are worlds and worlds of ways to explain _

_to tell you how I feel_

I stared and watched Janie as she stretched out beside the pool. I couldn't stop the goofy grin that formed on my face as she shifted on the towel. We were in LA, at my place. Which just happened to have a pool. She jumped at the chance to sun bathe. I smiled as I watched her from the doorway that led into the house. She had her iPod earphones in her ears and her small camouflage bikini on.

"You can stop staring at me now, Johnny," she said, a small smirk appearing on her lips. I smiled, "sorry," I muttered before walking over to where she was laying. She pulled me down onto the towel beside her and snuggled against my chest. We were both wearing our sunglasses and we just laid there for a while.

All of a sudden her head popped up and she leaned over me. She grinned down at me as she moved her glasses up to the top of her head before she kissed me. I grinned against her lips as I placed on of my hands on the small of her back.

Kissing her just felt so magical, that's how I felt. I couldn't think of words to explain what it was like. I was just lost in the passion of it. There are worlds of ways to explain how I feel.

_but I am speechless, speechless_

_that's how you make me feel _

_though I'm with you I am far away and nothing is for real _

_my head's spinning like a carousel, so silently I pray _

She pulled away and smiled down at me. She played with a strand of my hair, twirling it around her finger as she laid on my chest. Thought I may be laying there with her, I was far away in my mind. None of this seemed real. It felt like a dream. A dream that I never wanted to wake up from. I wanted to stay speechless here under her forever.

My head was spinning and silently I prayed that I could keep her here with me forever. To keep her as mine. To never know what it feels like to loose her. I know she is a good thing for me. She pecked my lips again before rolling off me and back onto the towel beside me, throwing a lazy arm across my waist.

_helpless and hopeless, that's how I feel inside _

_nothing's real, but all is possible if God is on my side _

_when I'm with you I am in the light where I cannot be found _

_it's as though I am standing in the place called Hallowed Ground _

We laid there and talked quietly for hours. I had been on vacation form the WWE for about 2 weeks. We had spent them together at my house. I didn't want to go back to work because I knew she wouldn't be coming back with me.

The economy was even effecting the WWE and Janie had politely lost her job. She didn't mind though, she dealt really well with it. We decided that while I was on the road she would just stay at my place. So she had moved some of her stuff in earlier in the week. Now we were done unpacking and were just relaxing together. Spending my last few free days doing nothing and laying in each others' arms.

She wrapped both of her arms around my waist as we laid there in the sun. I smiled before I kissed her forehead softly. In her arms I felt so helpless and hopeless. I was putty in her hands. She could do with me as she pleased, and I wouldn't mind what it was she did. As long as she loved me I was fine with it all.

_speechless, speechless, that's how you make me feel _

_though I'm with you I am far away and nothing is for real _

_I'll go anywhere and do anything just to touch your face _

_there's no mountain high I cannot climb _

_I'm humbled in your grace _

"C'mon babe, let's go upstairs," she said, standing and tugging on my hand with a mischievous smile on her lips. I grinned before grabbing her had and pulling her into me. "I like the sound of that," I murmured in her ear. She giggled before burying her head in my chest. "Do you want to or not?" she asked, a seductive tone that I had never heard from her before, seeped into her voice.

I was left speechless as she grabbed my hand and led me inside the house and up the stairs to our bedroom. She pushed me down onto the bed before straddling my waist. I grinned up at her, still at a lost for words. It felt like I was watching everything from a 3rd person's point of view. Like I was watching us from the doorway. But no, I was there.

She leaned down and kissed me. I'll go anywhere and I'd do anything just to be able to touch her. I let my hands linger around her waist before untying the top of her bikini. She giggled before kissing her way down my jaw to my neck. And she trailed down my chest, lower and lower.

_speechless, speechless, that's how you make me feel_

_thought I'm with you I am lost for words and nothing is for real _

_speechless, speechless, that's how you make me feel _

_though I'm with you I am far away, and nothing is for real _

We laid in bed after our fun activity. My arms were wrapped around her tightly as we both laid on our sides facing each other. Nothing felt real at this moment. It was too perfect to be real. I grinned as if kissed her softly. She returned it hungrily but I pulled back just to look at her. I touched her face, making sure that this was all real. That I really was this lucky.

I was speechless. At a loss for words. I didn't know what to do. This moment right now was magical."I love you Johnny," she whispered, grinning. I loved her, I knew it. But, I just...couldn't say it. I stared at her, speechless...

_speechless, speechless, that's how you make me feel_

_thought I'm with you I am lost for words and nothing is for real _

_speechless, Your love is magical, that's how I feel_

_but in your presence I am lost for words _

_words like, "I love you."_


	6. You Are Not Alone

**I know y'all love drama so there is some int he end of this chappy!!! lol! i hope you ENJOY! I kinda like this chappy, not my fav...but oh well!!! **

**please leave a REVIEW because REVIEWS=LOVE!!! thanks to everyone who has reviewed! you guys rock!!!**

**VOTE ON MY POLL! **

**I only own Janie and the plot...this is completely made up!**

**xoxoxo**

**Angel  
**

* * *

_**Song by Michael Jackson**_

_**Chapter 6- You Are Not Alone**_

_**

* * *

**_

_another day has gone_

_I'm still alone _

_how could this be _

_you're not here with me_

_you never said goodbye_

_someone tell me why_

_did you have to go _

_and leave my world so cold_

_Janie's POV_

John had been on the road for about 2 months now, and I'd only seen him twice. And for two days each time. That was all. Sure, I was living in his house that smelt and felt like him, but he wasn't here. And without him, this place was just a huge mansion that meant absolutely nothing to me.

What was worse was that John didn't even know when he'd be able to see me again. He was busy, he'd be getting a title shot on SmackDown against Jeff Hardy. I tried to sound happy for him when we were on the phone, but we both knew my hopeful wishes to him were hollow. That I really wish he'd get injured and come home.

I know that's a horrible thing to think or hope for, but I hate being alone without him. I thought me moving here would mean I'd see more of him when he was on the road. But I guess not. Because I'm still alone and John isn't here with me.

I leaned against the wall. The morning he left, he didn't even wake me up. He didn't even say goodbye. I know he thought he was doing the right thing, because if I had been awake I wouldn't have let him go, but still. He didn't even leave a note or anything. I woke up and he was just gone. His side of the bed empty. His clothes in the dresser and closet; gone.

The night before he left I had told him I loved him. And he had just stared at me. Nattie was probably right when she said he only liked forbidden things. Well, of course I had told Nattie everything that happened. After I lied to her that night telling her John and I were 'just good friends' I felt horrible and the next day I called her.

We met up for coffee and I told her all about it. She told me to be careful, that maybe now he seemed really interested, but in a while when John and I were exclusive to each other. The shiny daring aspect of 'us' may wear off. And I think that's what was happening. I mean, come on, we'd been together for a few weeks, sure I said it quickly but I had fallen in love with him a long time before I said it.

I thought maybe he had too. I guess not. But then he just left, and it broke my heart. He could tell something was off with me. When he came home for those first 2 days he instantly noticed I was acting weird. I had told him it was nothing, just 'that time of the month.' And he had just nodded, not wanting to get into it.

Safe to say, those 2 nights were particularly boring. The second time he came home I covered up my awkwardness better and he never noticed anything. And now I was alone. For a while more, it seems. I wish someone could tell me why he had to go like he did, and why my world seemed so cold without him.

_everyday I sit and ask myself _

_how did love slip away_

_something whispers in my ear and says_

_that you are not alone _

_for I am here with you _

_though you're far away_

_I am here to stay_

I was fearing the worst. Maybe he was staying on the road because he was holding off the break up. If that was really why he "didn't know next time he'd be home" I was certainly pissed. Well, I was getting angry anyway. Every time he had left home after being here for 2 days, I said "Goodbye Johnny, I love you" and he wouldn't respond.

He'd just stare then leave. And that stung. He couldn't say, "I love you too" It was like fucking impossible for him.

I walked into the empty and silent living room and sat down in one of the leather chairs with a sigh. Why does love slip away from me every time? I look at my cell phone, which had been laying on the coffee table since last night. I picked it up and it showed I had a new message.

My eyebrows furrowed but I dialed my voice mail. I was shocked when I heard John's voice on the other line. It's not that he didn't call me often, it's just that he called and I didn't answer. It kinda made me feel bad about it.

"You are not alone. I am thee with you, though you're far away. I am here to stay," John said. I grinned.

_but you are not alone _

_for I am here with you _

_though we're far apart _

_you're always in my heart _

_but you are not alone _

"Janie, you're always in my heart. I can't wait till I get home. 2 weeks until I'm there with you," his voice finished and then the line went dead. I shut the phone and stiffly set it down on the coffee table again. That was it? No, 'I love you, goodbye'??? I ran a hand through my hair, sighing again and again and again.

The greatness of this relationship was slowly coming to an end. And I was seeing what it was really going to be like. I didn't want to be in a relationship where I didn't see him and he couldn't say 'I love you.' I mean, he loves me, doesn't he?

Or maybe he doesn't. Maybe he's just with me for....I don't know. But for some reason other than because he loves me. I threw my head back, finally figuring it out. "I should've known," I muttered to myself.

_just the other night _

_I thought I heard you cry _

_asking me to come _

_and hold you in my arms _

_I can hear your prayers _

_your burdens I will bear _

_but first I need your hand _

_then forever can begin _

I laid in my hotel bed. 2 weeks, 2 more long weeks without Janie. Being away was killing me. And I knew she probably felt the same way. I remembered the last time I was home. I left at night, when she was sleeping. I thought I heard her crying from the hallway. I thought she was asking me to come and hold her in my arms.

She was dreaming, her eyes were closed and she was snuggled into the blankets. Earlier that night I heard Janie praying. She wasn't an extremely religious person, but I knew she believed their was someone up there. I had listened to her telling whomever all of her burdens and problems. And I felt as if I needed to make sure that all of those worries and fears would go away.

I sighed thinking about it now.

_everyday I sit and ask myself _

_how did love slip away_

_something whispers in my ear and says _

_that you are not alone _

_for I am here with you _

_though you're far away _

_I am here to stay _

I sat there for a while longer thinking of why I couldn't just tell Janie I loved her. I wondered how I could just let the words slip away every time I got the chance. I could almost hear Janie whispering in my ear, I knew I was imagining it, but still.

"You are not alone, I am here with you. Though you're far away, I am here to stay," she whispered.

_for you are not alone _

_for I am here with you _

_though we're far apart _

_you're always in my heart _

_for you are not alone_

"Though we're far apart, you're always in my heart. I love you," her voice whispered and just like that, it was gone. I closed my eyes with a sigh.

_whisper three words and I'll come running _

_and girl you know that I'll be there _

_I'll be there _

I finally decided that the next time I talked to her on the phone if she said 'I love you' I'd jump onto the next flight back to California and I'd surprise her. I'd pull her into my arms and tell her I loved her. I'd be there with her, loving her.

_you are not alone_

_for I am here with you _

_though we're far away _

_I am here to stay_

_for you are not alone _

_for I am here with you _

_though we're far apart _

_you're always in my heart _

Two more weeks had been far too long for me. I was so happy to boarding this plane back to LA. The flight felt like it drug on for hours and hours and finally, we landed. As quickly as possible I got my baggage then caught a cab back to my place.

_for you are not alone _

_for I am here with you _

_though you're far away_

_I am here to stay _

I couldn't help but let a smile spread across my face as I walked up the front steps and unlocked the front door. "Janie! I'm—!" I froze when I saw the boxes stacked in the hallway and a packed suitcase propped against the wall.

And Janie standing at the end of the hallway with her messenger bag on her shoulder, ready to leave.

_for you are not alone..._


	7. On The Line

**Okay, this chapter is pretty dramatic! AHHH! lol! umm...the summary ties into this chapter, hehe! So ENJOY!**

**please leave a REVIEW because REVIEWS=LOVE! thanks to everyone who has reviewed already!**

**i only own Janie....**

**xoxoxo**

**Angel**

**PS- VOTE ON MY POLL!  
**

* * *

_**Song by Michael Jackson**_

* * *

_**Chapter 7- On The Line**_

_No sense pretending it's over _

_hard times just don't go away_

_you gotta take that chip off your shoulder _

_it's time you open up_

_have some faith_

_John's POV_

I stared at her; what was going on? "Janie, what's with the...boxes?" I asked, looking up at her. She stared at me, her face emotionless. I could tell she's been crying though. My eyebrows furrowed, "Janie, what's going on?" I asked, taking a step toward her. "The moving truck should be here any minute," she said, looking me in the eye.

What? She crossed her arms over her chest. "We can't just pretend that things are perfect anymore John. They obviously aren't. You can't just make hard times go away, you can't just avoid me and stay on the road," she shook her head slowly, her light brown hair falling over her shoulder. I looked at her, "Janie, why..why do you think we're having problems?" I asked.

That made me sound so blind and inconsiderate. Her eyes darkened and I knew I had just made things worse for me. "You should've opened up and had some faith in us," she said evenly.

_nothing good ever comes easy _

_all good things come in due time _

_yes it does_

_you gotta have something to believe in _

_I'm telling you to open your mind_

"Nothing good ever comes easy John, good things come in time. And I thought I could deal with that, but I just can't. And I've waited for months now, and it still hasn't happened." She let out a huff of breath and looked down at the floor.

"I was trying to believe that we could work. Because you have to have something to believe in, but I just can't believe in us. I'm telling you to open your mind and really tell me that you don't know what's with the boxes," she stared at me.

_gotta put your heart on the line _

_if you wanna make it right _

_you've got to reach out and try _

_gotta put your heart on the line _

_if you wanna make it right _

_gotta put it all on the line_

"John, I've been hoping all this time that I could come up with some kind of excuse as to why you can't say you love me...but I can't come up with a damn thing! If you want to make this all right with me, you need to put your heart on the line. I know your break up with Melina wasn't the easiest and she broke your heart, but you need to get over that. You need to reach out and try to move on! You have to put it all on the line," she yelled, trying not to cry.

_you see yourself in the mirror_

_and you don't like what you see_

_and things aren't getting much clearer _

_don't you think it's time you go for a change_

_Janie's POV_

I spent hours in front of the full-length mirror this morning and just studied myself. I finally realized how unhappy I was with the way I was acting, living, just being. I didn't like what I saw, and things aren't getting any clearer. So, I thought it was time for a change, John needed to change or I was just going to leave.

So I packed up all my things, while bawling my eyes out. And called the Uhaul truck, and waited for John to get home. Which leads us to where we are now.

_don't waste your time on the past, no, no _

_it's time you look to the future_

_it's all right there if you ask _

_this time if you try much harder _

_you'll be the best that you can be _

"John you can't waste your time on the past! Melina is not with you anymore, I am," I said, wiping at my tears. "You need to look to your future and what you want in that future. I need to know if I'm in that future." I paused as he just stared at me, I felt like that was all he fucking ever did.

I adjusted the hat on my head with a heavy sigh, "I thought when we first got together that you were over your break up with Melina, I thought you knew that if you tried harder, you'd be a much better boyfriend. But god, how wrong was I?" the question was definitely rhetorical.

_gotta put your heart on the line _

_if you wanna make it right _

_you've got to reach out and try _

_gotta put your heart on the line _

_if you wanna make it right _

"I thought you could put your heart on the line for me, I thought you would want to make it right between us. I thought you'd want to love me, actually really fucking love me," I sighed again, "but I guess not. I feel like you never even tried!" I yelled, stomping my foot.

"You haven't been home in forever! You don't really call that often! I feel like you don't care that i'm here all by myself every single day. I'm beginning to question if you ever really were my best friend. I wouldn't be surprised if you've forgotten everything I ever told you." I paused, I had to know if he really had forgotten or not.

"What's my favorite song?" I asked, staring into his eyes. He opened his mouth to speak, but ended up looking away. I swallowed, I was right...

_if you wanna do it now _

_you gotta learn to try _

_you can make it right somehow _

_let love come free _

_and that's just so easy now _

_you gotta go for what you want _

_you gotta do what you got to do_

"So this is your last chance John, if you wanna do it know, here's the time. You gotta learn to try to just fucking say it if you feel it. This is how you can make it right. If you can actually say it then I will unpack these boxes but if you can't, I'll just assume that all these feelings and gestures were for shit, that you never felt the way I do," I walked toward him.

"It really is so damn easy, you gotta do what you want, what you feel," I paused. "John, I love you," I whispered. He met my eyes...

And there was silence. My heart slowed as my tears stopped. Fine, I had my answer. "Then I have to to, what I gotta do," I told him, walking past him. "I think you should leave the house for an hour or two while I get my stuff out of here." I said as I opened the front door and walked out to where the Uhaul was parked now.

He chose not to make it right. He didn't really love me.

_gotta put your heart on the line _

_if you wanna make it right _

_you've got to reach out and try _

_gotta put your heart on the line _

_if you wanna make it right _


	8. Don't Walk Away

**Personally I think that this chapter sucks. It was pretty hectic, the way i wrote it..so i apologize for the suckiness...umm, i need a beta for this fic...so if you wanna, let me know...**

**it's quite short, i'll try to make future chapters longer..but i had no inspiration while i wrote this chap..hopefully i gain some...read on and enjoy**

**please leave a REVIEW because REVIEWS=LOVE! thanks to everyone who has reviewed!**

**I only own Janelle Logan**

**xoxoxo**

**Angel  
**

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_**Song by Michael Jackson **_

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_**Chapter 8- Don't Walk Away**_

_Don't walk away _

_see I just can't find the right thing to say _

_I tried but all my pain gets in the way _

_tell me what I have to do so you'll stay _

_should I get down on my knees and pray_

_. _

_John's POV_

I couldn't let her walk away like that, I couldn't. I just...I spun around, leaving my bag in the hall and ran out to the front yard. "Janie!" I yelled. She froze and her shoulders tensed. She turned slowly, "what?" her voice was cold, but her eyes were watery with tears.

I stared at her, why could I never find the right thing to say to her. I opened my mouth to speak, but no words came out. Like usual. I try to but all my pain gets in the way, my heart was hurting. I stared at her, and she just glared back.

I knew what to say to make her stay...but I couldn't. Why couldn't I just say it. Maybe because I hadn't really, I dunno, admitted it to myself that I was in love with her. Should I get down on my knees and pray?

_and how can I stop losing you _

_how can I begin to say _

_when there's nothing left to do but walk away _

I met her hazel eyes. I couldn't say it, it just wasn't in me. I don't know why. I wanted to be with her, but did I really want to commit myself so fully to her? Would our relationship really work if I did say it?

But there is nothing left to say. And all there was left to do, was for Janie to walk away from me. To leave me here. To forget me. Maybe that's what's best for her. Maybe she should just went home and forgot ever being with me, or Phil.

_I close my eyes _

_just to try and see you smile one more time _

_but it's been so long now all I do is cry _

_can't we find some love to take this away _

_cause the pain gets stronger every day _

I closed my eyes, I wished she would just smile. So I could see it one more time before she left. Seeing her smile was the highlight of the days I was with her. And now, well....now I wasn't sure if that smile was what made me so happy around her. What had made me happy when I was with her? Why did I want her in the first place?

Because she was Phil's? Because she was something I couldn't have? I didn't know anymore.

_Janie's POV_

I stared at him, glowering. It'd been so long since the last time I had smiled. All I had done lately was cry. I wish he could find the truth in his heart, that he really did love me so he could take away all this pain. Because the pain inside of me gets stronger every day. It gets worse and worse. There's an empty void inside of me. And I can't fix it myself, can I?

_how can I begin again _

_how am I to understand _

_when there's nothing left to do but walk away _

I don't think, even if he explained why he could say it, that I could understand it. It just doesn't make sense, why had he wanted me in the first place. Just simple sexual attraction, not love. I never believed in love at first sight till I saw John in the parking lot that night so many months ago.

My dreams of having a happy family with John had been shattered. He didn't love me.

_see now why _

_all my dreams been broken _

_I don't know where we're going _

_everything we said and all we done now _

_don't let go, I don't wanna walk away _

All my dreams were fragmented and tumbling around me. I had no idea where I was going to go now. Maybe move back to my home town, got back to Northern California. Go home to Mom and Bailey. Maybe that's what I should do.

Everything that I'd ever said to John, how I told him various times that I loved him. I didn't want to let it go, he had fought for me. He had argued with one of his closest friends with me. I didn't want to let him go. But, I think the only thing left for me to really do is walk away.

_now why _

_all my dream been broken _

_don't know where we're going _

_everything begins to set us free _

_can't you see, I don't wanna walk away _

_John's POV_

Now I didn't even know if those dreams I'd had of me and Janie had ever been real. Or just something my mind created to make me believe something that wasn't real. But now, if she leaves, I think it'll set me free. Maybe I'll realize I shouldn't do anything like this to any other woman.

But, do I really want to give up the possibility of falling in love with Janie. I really think I could. Someday.

_if you go, I won't forget you girl _

_can't you see that you will always be _

_even though I had to let you go _

_there's nothing left to do _

But if she left, there's no possible way I'd forget her. She couldn't see though that she will always be in my heart. Even if I have to let her go like this. But it seems there's nothing left to do.

"Don't walk away," I whispered as she turned and walked to the Uhaul truck.

I had lost her.

_don't walk away _


	9. She's Out Of My Life

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_**This is one of my**__** fav MJ songs...so yeah...i had to use it, and it fits perfectly right here. I know we're all hoping John comes to his senses...and you'll see if he does! Six more chappies left! so ENJOY!**_

_**please leave a REVIEW because REVIEWS=LOVE! thanks to everyone who has reviewed so far!**_

_**i'm sorry this update is soooo late!**_

_**i only own Janelle 'Janie' Logan**_

_**xoxoxo**_

_**Angel  
**_

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_**Song by Michael Jackson **_

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_**Chapter 9- She's Out Of My Life**_

_she's out of my life _

_she's out of my life _

_and I don't know whether to laugh or cry _

_I don't know whether to live or die _

_and it cuts like a knife_

_she's out of my life_

_John's POV_

_// 4 hours later//_

I don't know how or why, but I went for a four hour drive, to the beach and back. I knew I didn't want to see her load all of her belongings into that cursed truck and then drive off without saying goodbye. I knew she wouldn't. It would hurt both of us too much.

I parked my car in the driveway. The Uhaul was gone. Meaning she was too. It hadn't just been all a dream. It had really happened. I had really broken her heart. And now she was gone. Now, she was out of my life.

I walked up to my front door and opened it, looking around the now pretty empty house. Her stupid stuffed animals weren't on the shelf in the hallway, but all of our pictures were gone. The bathroom counter was free of her make up and hair products, but now her pink toothbrush wasn't there in the holder next to mine.

I didn't know whether I wanted to laugh with relief, or cry. I walked through the bathroom, through the door that connected it to my bedroom. I flopped down on my bed and rolled onto my back, running a hand through my hair. I laid there for hours, just thinking....replaying every moment I had with her. Every chance that I'd ever had to tell her...

To tell her what? I think I made it obvious to myself, and to her, that I couldn't say I loved her. So did I?

The answer; well, I wasn't so sure of it. I didn't know whether after her leaving if I should live or die. But truthfully, I didn't want her out of my life completely. The world, my world, seemed so dreary without her here. And the fact that everything inside of me seemed empty without her cut like a knife.

Because I had caused this pain to myself. And I had caused her to leave. And now she's out of my life...

_it's out of my hands_

_it's out of my hands _

_to think for two years, she was here _

_and I took her for granted, _

_I was so cavalier _

_now the way that it stands_

_she's out of my hands _

And now she was gone. Probably driving back to her hometown. The not-so-well-known town of Concord, California. A good six + hour drive away from here. But the choice of her coming back was out of my hands really. I hadn't said those three words, and that wasn't going to change in a few seconds. So, it's all up to her whether she wishes to see me again, really.

But we'd been together for three months. And sure, 2 and a half of those three months I was on the road, which I felt horrible about. But that's my job, I had to be on the road. And she was just sitting here alone, in my house. I had taken her for granted, being with her everyday for two weeks and then, just leaving like that.

That must have hurt her. But now, the way that I look at it all. I can't control any of it, I couldn't control what happened then, and I can't do anything more now. It's out of my hands. She's out of my hands.

_so I've learned that love's not possession_

_and I've learned that love won't wait _

_now I've learned that love needs expression _

_but I learned too late _

Now I get it, I guess. Janie wasn't a possession, but that's what I treated her like. I fought over her, like you would a championship belt. But she's not belt, she's a beautiful, amazing, and loving woman. And i've learned that love won't wait. She had waited, for over two months for me to say I loved her, and I still didn't.

That was a mistake. The more and more I thought about her, and all the moments I had spent with her. Well, I am in love with her. And love needs expression. And now, I know I could tell her that I love her. Because I really do.

I sat up and walked over to my dresser and opened the top drawer on my side. I smiled, she never knew about this drawer. I pulled out the thick gold chain with the small heart charm, on the back it said _For my Johnny. I love you, Janie_. I remember the night I wanted to get her something and she caught me at the jewelry store. Truth was, she was there to get me something.

And that's when she got me that necklace. I hooked it around my neck. I wouldn't take it off until I had her back. I may have realized a little late that I loved her. But I knew now, and I had to tell her so.

_she's out of my life _

_she's out of my life _

_damned indecision and cursed pride_

_kept my love for her locked deep inside _

_and it cuts like a knife _

She may be out of my life. But that's just for now. That could, and will, all change. I had been indecisive earlier about whether or not I love her. And my pride wouldn't let me admit to myself to her, that I was really in love. But now I was ready to. I had kept my love for her locked deep inside of me. And it cut like a knife when I realized I loved her, but she was gone.

I packed a bag quickly. It was time for a road trip.

_she's out of my life_


	10. Can't Let Her Get Away

**Alright, here is the next chappy! I was soooo happy when i finally got a burst of inspiration for this fic! so i hope this chappy is as good as i thought it was...you'll just have to let me know, eh? **

**other than that please leave a REVIEW because REVIEWS=LOVE! thanks to everyone who has reviewed so far! and VOTE ON MY POLL!**

**I only own Janelle Logan....uhh, yeah...and Bailey Logan...that's it! **

**only 5 more chapters**

**and just btw, i edited out some lyrics because this song was SUPER repetitive at the end and really REALLY long..so this is shortened and i do not own it!  
**

**xoxoxo**

**Angel  
**

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_**Song by Michael Jackson**_

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_**Chapter 10- Can't Let Her Get Away**_

_I thought she had to have it_

_Since the first time she came _

_who knows the situation _

_Mysteries remain _

_and now I wonder why_

_I breakdown when I cry _

_is it something I said _

_or is it just a lie _

_(is it just a lie)_

_Narrative POV_

John had been driving for two hours already, and still he was as determined as when he left. He had to find Janie. While he drove, he thought of when he had first met her. She had been standing outside the arena, waiting for Phil. Staring up at the stars, looking beautiful. John would always remember that moment. When she first talked to him, and smiled. His heart had melted for the hazel-eyed brunette.

And then, the first time they had kissed, when she came to his locker room and he found her waiting there for him after his match. He licked his lips just thinking about that night. It was then he knew what she wanted. Him, and she had to have it.

But he didn't know the real situation with her, why she had fallen for him in the first place. That mystery still remains unanswered for John.

//

In Concord, Janie sat alone in her room. Her sister was out, doing who knows what, she was in college, and was unpredictable. I guess that's one thing the two sisters had in common, their un-predictability. Janie sighed as she hid her face in her hands. She hadn't stopped crying since she got to her sister's place.

Her mom had been worrying about her, but Janie insisted she was fine. Lie. But Janie didn't care, she didn't want to be pitied by her mother, and especially not her sister. Janie laid back on her bed, she didn't just cry anymore. She broke down. And now she was wondering why John didn't love her. Is it because she said it so early on.

Or was he lying to her when he didn't reply?

_I try so hard to love you_

_some things take time and shame _

_I think the whole world of you _

_your thoughts of me remain _

_I'll play the fool for you _

_I'll change the rules for you _

_just say it and I'll do _

_just make this thing come true_

_(make this dream come true)_

She had tried so hard to love him. She had stayed with him, gone on the road with him, moved in with him. Did whatever he wanted. Some things, like love, took time and shame. She thought the whole world of John, she adored him. And she knew his thoughts of her probably still remained. Just like she couldn't stop thinking about him.

//

John kept driving. He was about ready to do anything to get her back. Even if what he did made him look like a total fool. If it helped any, he would do it. He'd do anything she said, if it meant she'd take him back.

He honked his horn, frustrated as someone tried to switch lanes in front of him, almost hitting the front end of his car. He just wanted Janie back. He was willing to put up with insane drivers, and hours of long traffic, just to see her again. To talk to her. To beg her.

_if I let her get away _

_thought I'm begging on my knees_

_I'll be crying everyday _

_knowing the girl that got away _

Yes, to beg her. He was ready for when he saw her. He get down on his knees and beg her to take him back. He'd say it over and over, "I love you Janie" as much as he could. And if she said she didn't want him, he'd respect that. And he'd cry everyday, knowing that the girl of his dreams had got away.

_I can't let _

_I can't let her get away _

_I can't let_

_I can't let her get away _

He was pushing the speed limit, but not speeding. It had been hours, and he'd only stopped once to get some disgusting fast food. As much as he hated it, he had been starting, and couldn't stop long enough to eat at an actual restaurant. He wouldn't let himself pause in this journey. He had to get to her as soon as possible. Screw sleep, and screw hunger from this point on.

He couldn't let her get away. He just couldn't. She was the woman for him. The one he could see himself with for the rest of his life. The mother of his children. He could see it all, their whole life, planned out in front of him. Photographs they'd have hanging on the wall of their home, that they owned together.

He was so close to that. Only two more hours of driving and he'd find her.

_I tried to mastermind it _

_by saying let it be _

_but every time I did I _

_the hurt came back at me_

_I told you that I need you _

_a thousand times and why _

_I played the fool for you _

_and still you said goodbye _

_(still you said goodbye)_

//

Janie stared out the window of her room. The tears had stopped for now. She couldn't help but let herself fantasize that John was driving from LA to Contra Costa, just to tell her he loved her, and that he wanted her back. If she'd take him.

But she knew better. She couldn't rely on her dreams of him actually loving her. He didn't, that had been made obvious for her. She sighed, _just let it be Janelle_. She told herself, but she didn't feel any better. Actually she felt worse, the pain came back. That gaping hole where her heart should be. She had told him numerous times that she loved him and needed him. But he had never responded. That hurt so much for her.

She had made herself look like such a fool probably. She had given up her relationship with Phil for John. And look what happened. She's even more brokenhearted than when she wouldn't get to see Phil for a week or so. And even though she'd given all that up, out of love, John still didn't love her.

_If I let her get away_

_then the world will have to see_

_a fool who lives alone _

_and the fool who set you free_

//

John's fingers tapped on his steering wheel as he was paused yet again at a stoplight. These damn things were getting really annoying. Finally the light turned green and he sped forward. He was so close, only and hour away from her. It was dark now, around ten o'clock. And he wanted nothing more than to be at her house now. He knew that she had probably gotten to her sister's house a good four hours ago.

And he knew if he didn't get there soon, and he let her get away that the whole world, especially his coworkers would see the fool who lives alone and set the most beautiful girl in the world free; John Hennigan.

_I can't let _

_I can't let her get away_

_I can't let _

_I can't let her get away_

"Almost there, almost there, almost there," he muttered under his voice. Thank god he had map quested her sister's address before he had left. And thank god he had remembered her sister's address in the first place. He glanced at the clock on his dashboard. 10:30. Why couldn't he just be there already?

He ran a hand through his hair and then checked his phone. Mike had called him a while ago, but he hadn't answered. He didn't care about what Mike had to say anyways. Even if it was important.

He was so close, he pressed down on the gas. He needed to get there sooner.

_can't let go_

_can't let go_

_//_

Janie sighed as she stood up. She couldn't mope around here. That'd been all she'd done for the past four hours since she got here. She rummaged around in her suitcase and finally found a pair of jeans and a cute top before she walked into the bathroom and took a shower.

Sure, she couldn't let go of her time with John completely. But she could try to forget it. When she stepped out of the shower she heard her sister come through the front door. "I'm home sis!" she called. "Hey Bails!" Janie said as she trotted down the hall. Bailey smiled at her, "I'm glad to see you're in a better mood," the dirty blond woman smirked. Janie shrugged, "I was thinking of going out. You remember that bar Mom and I took you to when you turned 21? I could use a drink," Janie said with a shrug and a witty laugh.

Her sister was a sucker for alcohol. "Sure sis, just let me change into some better drinking clothes," Bailey said, motioning to the suit jacket and matching kinda-short skirt she was wearing. "Where were you?" Janie asked her. Bailey grinned, "job interview," she answered. Janie rose her eyebrows, "at night?" she asked.

Bailey shrugged, "we went to dinner," she said. "Was 'we' you and a female, or you and a male?" Janie asked, knowing her sister well enough to guess it was a man. Bailey shrugged as she walked back out of her bedroom wearing a the same skirt but with a red top. "Does it matter?" she asked.

Janie sighed, "I guess not." and she shrugged before they both headed to the door. "But he was hot," Bailey whispered in her sister's ear as Janie pulled open the door. She turned, her eyes widened, and she froze...

_I can't let_

_I can't let her get away _

_I can't let_

_I can't let her get away_


	11. One More Chance

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**Well, this fic is almost done..but i'm toying with the idea of there being a sequel, that isn't all songfic chapters..but idk..let me know what YOU think! thanks to everyone who has reviewed! I only own Janelle and Bailey Logan.**

**please leave a REVIEW because REVIEWS=LOVE! and VOTE ON MY POLL!**

**xoxoxo**

**Angel  
**

* * *

_**Song by Michael Jackson**_

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_**Chapter 11- One More Chance**_

_This time gonna do my best to make it right_

_can't go on without you by my side_

_hold on_

_shelter come and rescue me out of this storm_

_and out of this cold I need someone_

_oh why oh why why why_

_if you see her _

_tell her this for me_

_all I need is_

_**Janelle's POV**_

No, no, no. It couldn't be. I had to be seeing things. Right? John couldn't possibly be standing here. On my sister's porch. It just wasn't possible. Was it?

My eyes were wide as I stared at him. He reached a hand out, and touched my fingers. I let out the breath I had subconsciously been holding. He was real. He was here. How? Why? None of this made sense anymore. The world was incoherent. I couldn't process a single thought in my mind. So instead, I just turned and walked back into the house.

"Janelle?" My sister questioned. I was leaning against the wall, trying not to cry. "Janie, please talk to me. Just for a second," John pleaded. I swallowed. "Please, just let me explain why i'm here," John pleaded. I shook my head before jogging up the steps, as far away as I could get from John at this moment.

_**John's POV**_

I should've know she wouldn't want to talk to me. Her sister, i'm guessing that's who this woman was, turned to me. "Who are you?" she asked, trying to sound polite, but a little confused about the way Janie had reacted to me. "I'm John," I said. Bailey's eyes widened. "The boy. And, i'm guessing, the reason as to why my sister showed up here without any notice," she studied me.

"My sister has good taste, better than mine," she muttered, rolling here eyes as she leaned against the doorframe. "Well, I guess you know who I am. Bailey," she introduced, offering me her hand. I nodded and shook it, "Yeah, i'm the reason," I said, quietly. She studied me again with narrowed eyes. "So what's the whole deal with all of this?" she asked.

I took a breath. I explained the whole situation to her. "...I want to make everythign righ twiht Janie. I can't go on without her by my side," I said with a sigh.

_one more chance at love_

_one more chance at love _

_(one more)_

_one more chance at love_

_one more chance at love_

I looked up at Bailey, who had barely any resemblance to her beautiful sister. "I just need one more chance. And I'll show her that I really do want her," I said, taking a breath. I really needed her, more than words could say.

I had fucked up, I knew that. It was obvious.

_searching for that one who is going to make me whole_

_help me make these mysteries unfold_

_hold on_

_lighting about to strike in rain only on me_

_hurt so bad sometimes it's hard to breathe_

_oh why why_

_if you see her _

_tell her this for me_

_all I need is_

"I've been searching for that one perosn who will complete me. Who will help the mysteries of love unfold for me. And I found her, in Janie. And after she left, it hurt so bad. It hurt every time I took a breath. It feels like there's a permanent rain cloud hanging over me, storming away." I paused, lickign my lips.

I met Baileys hazel eyes, one of the only likenesses she had to my gorgeous Janie. "Will you please tell her this for me. All I need is one more chance," I said.

_one more chance at love_

_one more chance at love _

_(one more)_

_one more chance at love_

_one more chance at love_

Bailey stared at me, measuring me, I suppose. After a few seconds of silence, and her replaying the words in her head she nodded slowly. "Yeah, I-I'll tell her John," Bailey said slowly. I was skeptic though, she sounded as if she wasn't going to.

"Please don't lie to me about this. I would walk around this Earth to find Janie. I don't care what it takes, if I have to I will go and start throwing rocks at her window until she talks to me. I will get down on my knees and beg. I'd sail across the ocean to see her. Will you please just tell her some of that. Get her to understand that I do love her." I took a breath.

"That I need her," here it comes, "that I love her."

_and I would wlak around this world to find her_

_and I don't care what it takes no_

_why_

_i'd sail the seven seas to be near her_

_and if you happen to see her _

_tell her this for me_

_**Janie's POV**_

_"That I need her," he paused, "that I love her." _The words John had just uttered echoed through my mind. He loved me. My heart started beating again, the blood start circulating through my body once more. The world seemed absolutely right for a moment. But then I realized John was saying goodbye to Bailey. He was going to leave.

I couldn't let him go. Not yet.

_one more cahnce at love_

_(yeah, yeah)_

_one more chance at love_

_(tell her this for)_

_one more chance at love_

_one more chance at love_

_(Lovin' you)_

_one more chance at love_

_(I can't stop)_

_**John's POV**_

Well, that had seemed like a failure of a plan. What do I do know. She doesn't want me back. I sighed as I walked toward my car. I had just driven several hours in my car for nothing. I looked up to unlock my car and froze when I saw someone sitting on the hood of the car. My breath caught in my throat.

"Janie." I said. Her face turned to look at me, I could barely see the movement in the dark. She slipped off the car and walked toward me slowly. She stopped in front of me, so close I could hear her breathing. I swallowed, and so did she.

"I think I can give you just one more chance," she said before she rose up onto her toes and kissed me.

_one more chance at love_


	12. I Can't Help It

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**Kay...well, this chappy is pretty boring..sorry...but the last few have been drama filled so...break time on that..lol! ENJOY**

**please leave a REVIEW because REVIEWS=LOVE!!! thanks to everyone who has reviewed! you guys rock! **

**please vote on my poll!!!!**

**i only own Janelle!**

**xoxoxo**

**Angel  
**

* * *

_**Song by Michael Jackson**_

* * *

_**Chapter 12- I Can't Help It**_

_looking in my mirror_

_took me by surprise _

_I can't help but see you _

_running through my mind _

_**John's POV**_

We were in my car now. Janie was going to have Bailey drive her stuff back down to LA this weekend. She didn't want to stay the night in her sister's place, so she was directing me toward a hotel in the area. I smiled over at her, her hand was in my free one as I kept the other on the steering wheel. She smiled back at me.

Her purse was on her lap and I saw she was texting on her phone. "Who you talking to?" I asked. She grinned, "Nattie." she answered. I glanced over at her, "did you tell her?" I questioned. She smiled and rolled her eyes, "no, I didn't tell her," she said sarcastically.

I rolled my eyes back at her, "just asking," I muttered, kissing the back of her hand. "I love you," I murmured. She stared at me for a second before a sweet smile tilted her lips. "I love you too Johnny," she said softly.

_helpless like a baby _

_sensual disguise _

_I can't help but love you _

_it's getting better all the time _

I parked in front of the hotel, taking my duffel bag out from the backseat as well as Janie's. She wrapped her arms around my waist as we walked, making it slightly difficult. "Do you think we'll be able to get a room, it's after midnight?" I asked. She grinned, "don't worry, I know the manager. She's still here," Janie said. I cocked an eyebrow at her as she opened the door to the hotel for me.

There was no one in the lobby and I glanced at Janie doubtfully. She rolled her eyes and pulled her cellphone out of her purse, dialing a number. After a short conversation she hung up and turned to me. "She'll be here in 3...2...1," Janie said and just then a door behind the concierge desk opened and a woman in her mid-fifties walked out, smiling.

"Hi Hun, and this must be John," the woman said after hugging Janie. I looked at Janie, confused. I could tell she wanted to laugh. "John, this is my mother, Laura." she introduced. I looked to the woman, she now looked familiar. Well, do to the fact she looked like an older version of Janie. I smiled and offered my hand. Laura shook her head and instead pulled me into a hug.

I chuckled, affectionate, like Janie. "It's great to meet you John," Laura said, smiling. "It's great to meet you too," I replied. "So you two need a room?" she asked, cocking an eyebrow at Janie, who blushed. I couldn't help but chuckle and Janie smacked me in the chest before looking at her mom. "Yeah, a room, please," Janie said.

_I can't help it if I wanted to _

_I wouldn't help it even if I could _

_I can't help it if I wanted _

_I wouldn't help it, no_

We headed to the elevators after Janie's mom said she was heading home for the night. I could tell Janie was tired, and I was too. I smiled, wrapping my arms around her waist from behind as we walked down the hall. She looked at me over her shoulder with a smile. I kissed the side of her neck then whispered in her ear, "let me carry you," I said.

She cocked an eyebrow and shook her head, "we're almost there," she said. I rolled my eyes, stopping her from walking. She sighed, knowing I wouldn't leave her alone till she let me. "Fine," she murmured. I smiled before scooping her up in my arms bridal style. She giggled as I kissed her before continuing down the hall.

_I can't help it if I wanted to _

_I wouldn't help it even if I could _

_I can't help it if I wanted _

_I wouldn't help it, no_

I smiled as she unlocked the door from my arms. I carried her inside and set her down on the bed. She rolled her eyes, "how the hell did you carry me and the bags?" she asked. I shrugged, "I'm strong," I said with a smirk. She pursed her lips, "yeah...I kinda knew that," she said sarcastically.

After setting the bags down I sat on the bed beside her, taking her hands in mine. "Janie, I'm so sorry about...yesterday," I said. She couldn't help it, and chuckled slightly then got serious. "I do love you, I loved you then. I just couldn't say it," I paused. "I don't have an excuse as to why I couldn't say it, I just..." I trailed off. I went to finish my sentence but Janie placed a finger on my lips.

"Sh," she whispered before removing her hand and kissing me. I stayed silent, placing my hands on her hips. "Let's get some rest, we have a long drive ahead of us tomorrow," she said, pulling away and getting up to get clothes from her bag. I laid down and watched her as she pulled off her top, reaching inside her bag to get a light tank top and a pair of pajama pants.

After she had changed, she laid down beside me. I shed my shirt and jeans, leaving me in my boxers. Janie smiled as she laid on her side. "Good night, Janie," I murmured. "I love you," she whispered. I leaned closer, pressing my forehead against hers, "I love you so much."

And I couldn't help it if I wanted to. Which I didn't.

_Love to run my fingers _

_softly while you sigh _

_love came and possessed you _

_bringing sparkles to your eyes_

I ran my fingers through her hair and her eyes opened halfway. She grinned at me lazily and let out a soft sigh as I traced my fingers down her arm and then her back. She grinned at me, her eyes sparkling. I loved her and I knew that my eyes must be shining the same way hers were, filled with love.

I wrapped my arms around Janie's waist, pulling her to me. She pressed her back to my chest, laying her head on the pillow. I grinned gently rubbing up and down her side. She murmured something tiredly that I couldn't hear and then, she was asleep.

I chuckled to myself. She was so beautiful.

_like a trip to heaven _

_heaven is the prize_

_and I'm so glad I found you girl_

_you're an angel in disguise_

I smiled as I woke up the next morning with Janie in my arms. I had missed this feeling so much. It felt like I was in heaven, having her laying next to me, her hair spilling over the pillow, her hands on mine. I breahted in her smell, she smelt like vanilla. I rested my head on her back, trying to go back to sleep.

"Mmm, you awake?" she asked sleepily. I nodded against her back and I felt her chuckle. I kissed her shoulder blade and felt her shiver. She rolled over so she was facing me, she touched my cheek softly. I leaned down and kissed her, brushing her hair out of her face. I rolled so I was hovering over her.

"I love you," I whispered, kissing her again. "I know," she murmured against my lips with a smirk.

_I can't help it if I wanted to _

_I wouldn't help it even if I could _

_I can't help it if I wanted _

_I wouldn't help it, no_

We were finally in my car now. Our bags in the trunk. "You ready to head back to LA?" I asked. She smiled at me, "I'm ready to go home," she answered. I smiled, taking her hand in mine, "me too." I murmured.

She talked as we drove, about pretty much nothing. Normal things, nothing serious, nothing that considered actual thought. And it was nice, to just be with her, laughing, talking. I had fallen in love with her, and I didn't want to change it, or help myself get out of it.

I would never help it.

_and I'm so glad I found you girl _

_you're an angel in disguise_

Hours later, I parked in the driveway of my house. Janie smiled, she had fallen asleep about two hours ago and I had woken her up awhile ago to get some food. Now, we were here. I opened her door for her, and then grabbed her bag out of the trunk, I didn't need my bag. She smiled at me, pecking my lips as she took the house key from me and went to open the door.

I had found her, and I am so happy I had.

_I can't help it if I wanted to _

_I wouldn't help it even if I could _

_I can't help it if I wanted _

_I wouldn't help it, no_


	13. I'll Come Home To You

**I know, a short-ish chappy..sorry..but, this is what came to me with the song...i didn't have much inspiration today, but JoMo Muse was up and was like "hey, let's write me!" so i did as he said...so, yeah...ENJOY**

**please leave a REVIEW because REVIEWS=LOVE! and thanks to everyone who has reviewed so far! you guys rock!**

**VOTE ON MY POLL PLEASE!!!!!!! **

**i only own Janelle 'Janie' Logan**

**xoxoxo**

**Angel  
**

* * *

_**Song by Michael Jackson**_

_**Chapter 13- I'll Come Home To You**_

_**

* * *

**_

_If I had my way girl _

_I'd never leave for a minute _

_but things don't always turn out _

_the way we want them to _

_so while I'm away _

_I want you to remember _

_how much I love you _

_I love you, I love you _

_**John's POV**_

I sighed as I listened to my messages. We were back at my house, Janie was up in the bedroom, taking a shower. I sighed, slamming my fist down onto the counter. "John?" he voice was soft and questioning. I sighed again, "Vince...wants me back on the road tomorrow," I said, not looking at her. I heard her sigh, then she wrapped her arms around me from behind, resting her head on my back. "Well then, i'll be here waiting for you," she whispered.

I pressed my lips together. She was amazing, she'd really wait for me, I knew she would. I turned around in her arms and she smiled up at me. I knew this wasn't ideal for her. I get her back then she sits here alone for two or more weeks. I touched her cheek and her smile widened. "I love you," I whispered. I don't think I could ever say that enough, I had to make up for all the times I didn't say it. She sighed again, resting her head against my chest.

I wrapped my arms around her, resting my chin atop her head. "You know, If I had my way, i'd never leave you," I whispered. I felt her chuckle, "yeah, but you don't own the WWE, and things don't always turn out the way you want them to anyways," she said, pulling back to look up at me with a slight smile.

I kissed her softly. When we broke apart I locked my gaze with hers, keeping my face close, "while i'm gone I want you to remember how much I love you," I murmured. "C'mon, you need some rest if you're gonna be traveling tomorrow," she said, grabbing my hand and leading me upstairs. I grinned.

_let this love lift you up_

_when you're feeling blue _

_wherever I go, I will be loving you _

_think of me when you see _

_places we once shared _

_whatever I do, someday I'll need you there _

I grinned as I watched her stumble down the stairs. It was early and even though Janie was usually a morning person, I knew today she didn't want to get up. And we'd had a few tiring and dramatic days. She smiled at me as I handed her a cup of coffee. She glanced toward the front door and raised her eyebrows at me, "good job, you packed without my help," she said. I rolled my eyes, kissing her.

She set her mug on the counter and looked at me. "So, I guess i'll see you in a few weeks," she said. I smiled sadly, "yeah, but i'll call you as much as possible," I told her, placing my hand on either side of her face, smoothing back her hair. She grinned, "don't worry about calling me, worry about getting home," she half-joked. I smiled, kissing her. "I love you," I murmured against her lips. "I know John," she said.

I pouted, giving her puppy dog eyes and she sighed, "I love you too," she said. I grinned, hugging her to me tightly. "Someday, you'll be coming with me every time I leave," I said, looking down at her. She nodded, not believing me. "Babe, I promise," I said. "Alright John, I love you, have fun," she said, pecking my lips.

"At work? Without you? How is any of that fun," I joked and she rolled her eyes, pushing me toward the door. "Get going, I don't want you to get yelled at by your boss," she said. I smirked, kissing her one last time before heading for my car. I paused, "do you want the car?" I asked. She shook her head, "my mom is driving my car down," she answered. I nodded and got into the car. I waved to her out the window. She smiled sadly, waving back and blew me a kiss.

Like any guy who was in love I did something really cheesy. I acted like I caught her kiss and held it to my chest. She started laughing. Then I drove away.

_wherever I go, whatever I do _

_I'll always come home_

_I'll come home to you _

_even though we both know_

_you're not in my arms _

_wherever I go, you're always in my heart _

Two weeks later I stood in front of my house, taking my house key out to unlock the door. I opened the front door and stepped inside. A huge smile spread across my face. All her stuff was back in place. Everything was finally back to normal. Janie's car was in the driveway, her green and orange square glass plates in the cupboard. Now where was she?

_just you ask, I'll come back _

_though we're miles apart _

_whatever I do, I'll come to where you are _

_wherever I go, whatever I do _

_I'll always come home _

_I'll come home to you _

_wherever I go, whatever I do _

_I'll always come home _

I walked up the stairs toward our bedroom. I paused outside the closed door, hand on the knob. I turned it and opened the door. I grinned at the sight before me. Janie was curled up on the bed, wrapped in her _Lilo and Stitch _blanket, her earphones in her ears still playing. I walked over to the bed and pulled the earphones out of her ears.

"Janie, I'm home."

_I'll come home to you_


	14. I Just Can't Stop Loving You

* * *

_**Sorry this took so long...life has been hectic....uhhhhh, well, in this chappy i edited the lyrics a lot..so...yeah...they won't completely match the song...anyways..this is the second to last chappy! meaning, the next one, is the last one! there may possibly be a sequel. Let me know what you think- non-songfic sequel--or sonfic sequel???**_

_**pleas leave a REVIEW because REVIEWS=LOVE! and i could use a lot of that! thanks to everyone who has reviewed so far! and VOTE on my POLL! ENJOY**_

_**i only own Janelle R. Logan**_

_**xoxoxo**_

_**Angel  
**_

* * *

_**Song by Michael Jackson (feat. Siedah)**_

* * *

_**Chapter 14- I Just Can't Stop Loving You **_

_I just want to lay next to you for awhile _

_you look so beautiful tonight _

_your eyes are so lovely _

_you mouth is so sweet _

_a lot of people misunderstand me _

_that's because they don't know me at all _

_I just want to touch you and hold you _

_I need you, god I need you _

_I love you so much _

_**John's POV**_

I smiled as her eyes opened. She smiled instantly when she saw me and sat up, wrapping her arms around me. I held her to me tightly. The love of my life was in my arms, everything felt perfect in the world. Like nothing could ever go wrong again. Which I doubted, but knowing that I'd have Janie by my side, the world and life itself didn't seem so frightening. The future seemed less intimidating.

Because, if she said yes tomorrow, then she would be by my side for that future; which in my own logic, made the future less of a thing to worry about.

I laid down beside Janie and she smiled at me as she snuggled into my arms. I kissed her forehead, smiling. Her big hazel eyes looked up at me as she smiled widely. "I'm glad you're home, I missed you so much," she whispered. My smiled softened as I leaned closer to her, kissing her sweet lips.

She'd probably never get it, but so many people misunderstood me. They though I was some selfish, vain, self-obsessed superstar. But I'm the exact opposite. Sure, I like to look good, but for health reasons. Et cetera. But the reason they all misunderstand me is because they don't know me. But Janie, she got me. She understood everything that I told her, even if it seems confusing to myself.

That's why I'm ready to take this next step. I was pulled out of my thoughts as she linked her fingers through mine. She rolled onto her side and I wrapped my arms around her waist. I just wanted to touch her and to hold her tonight. I've needed her for so long now. I hated being away. And now since I'm home, I just want to spend every second with her. "I love you so much, Janie," I whispered in her ear.

I saw her lips curl up in a smile, but her eyes stayed closes, "I love you too Johnny," she murmured before she fell asleep in my arms. Just how it should be.

_you know how I feel _

_this thing can't go wrong _

_I'm so proud to say I love you _

_you've love's got me high _

_I long to get by _

_this time is forever _

_love is the answer _

Janie knew how I felt. I've told her so many times since that night I drove to Northern California. Things had just felt so perfect lately, I knew it was the perfect time. Every time I tell her I love her, I feel so proud. Because she says it back. I'm proud to be the man that she calls hers. I'm proud to belong to her. I love belonging to her.

I really only need her love to get by. I want to be with her forever. For the rest of my life. And the way to get what I want, is just to love her.

_I just can't hold on _

_I feel we belong_

_my life ain't worth living _

_If I can't be with you _

_I just can't stop loving you _

_I just can't stop loving you _

_and if I stop..._

_then tell me just what will I do_

_**Janie's POV**_

I smiled as I was snuggled in John's arms. He hadn't been home in a while, but when he did come home, he made up for the time away. Every time he said 'I love you' to me, my heart fluttered. I knew he meant it. And the emotions inside of me were so strong. Self-control is a hard thing to have around him.

But I know I belong with John. He's risked so much to be with me, he's done so much to prove his love to me. And without him, my life would be pointless. Because I wouldn't be able to function without him. I just can't stop loving John. And if I did, what would I do?

What would happen to me? I don't want to know the answer, and I don't need to know it.

Because I'm going to keep on loving John for the rest of my life.

_cause I just can't stop loving you _

_at night when the stars shine _

_I pray in you I'll find _

_a love so true _

I watched him as he slept. I knew he was tired, he always was on the night he returned home. I smiled, in the morning I'd cook him breakfast and then we'd spend the day cuddling. We had a schedule for the whole first day. Then we went from there.

"I'm so in love with you John Hennigan," I murmured, playing softly with a strand of his hair as he slept.

_when morning awakes me _

_will you come and take me _

_I'll wait for you _

_**John's POV**_

I smiled as I woke up with Janie by my side. She looked so beautiful, her light brown hair splayed out on the pillow. I rolled onto my stomach, supporting myself on my elbows. "Janie, babe, wake up," I whispered in her ear.

She grumbled slightly for a moment then opened her eyes. Her smile was on her lips instantly. "Good morning Johnny," she whispered. "G'morning Janie," I murmured, kissing her. "I'm gonna go make breakfast. Why don't you go take a shower and make yourself more beautiful than you already are. If that's possible," I said, pecking her lips again before getting up off the bed.

She stared at me, surprised, with one eyebrow cocked. "What?" I asked her from the doorway. She shrugged, "it's just that...I usually cook the first day you're home," she said. I smiled, "I want to cook for you. Can you let me do that?" I asked. She laughed, "alright, fine, fine," she muttered getting out of bed and going into the bathroom. I smiled to myself before leaving the room and heading downstairs.

//

I looked up, hearing her footsteps on the staircase. I was just finishing placing the food on the table. She gave the food a short glance before she turned her gaze to me. She obviously wasn't very hungry. That made me smile. She wrapped her arms around my neck, nuzzling my shoulder affectionately. "What's gotten into you this morning?" she asked, giving the stack of pancakes another glance.

Maybe she was hungry. "Mmm, nothing. Just in a very good mood," I answered, kissing her nose. "Sit down, let's eat," I said. Glancing subtly at the small box set on her plate that she hadn't noticed yet. Gotta love my unobservant girlfriend. She sat down, eyes following me as she moved. I could see that sexy smirk on her lips and I knew what she wanted.

It made me smirk back. But there was something that I had to do first. She reached over her plate to get a pancake, but stopped short. She finally noticed the small, black velvet box. Her mouth fell open slightly as she looked up at me and pointed at the box in question.

I smiled, standing up and taking the box off her plate. She turned in her chair, watching me as I knelt in front of her. I saw the tears spring to her eyes, she knew what was coming.

_you know how I feel _

_I won't stop until _

_I hear your voice saying _

"_I do"_

_this feeling's so strong_

I swallowed, looking up at her. "Janelle Renee Logan. You are the most beautiful, loving, amazing, exciting, frustrating, adorable, honest person I know. And there are so many other men out there. And you chose me, you fought for me. And I did everything I could to get you back. You know how I feel, you know I love you. And I won't stop loving you as my girlfriend until I hear you say 'I do,'" I paused seeing her face.

"And once you're legally my wife, my feelings will only become stronger." I sated, meeting her eyes. I opened the small box revealing the ring.

_well, my life ain't worth living _

_if I can't be with you _

_I just can't stop loving you _

_I just can't stop loving you _

_and if I stop..._

_then tell me, just will I do _

"Janie, without you, my life isn't worth living. The reason I make it through all those days on the road is because I know that I am just counting down the days till I see you again. Janie, I just cannot stop loving you. So will you please shut me up and marry me?" I asked.

She laughed through her tears as she looked down at me. "Yes John, of course I'll shut you up. Please stop talking and kiss me," she said. I chuckled, slipping the ring onto her left ring finger. I stood up, pulling her out of the chair and crushing her against my body.

_This is my life and I,_

_want to see you for always_

_I just can't stop loving you _

_and if I stop..._

_what will I do? _

_Then tell me, just what will I do_

_I just can't stop loving you _

Janie is my life. I wanted to wake up to her every morning, I wanted to be the last person she sees before she goes to sleep each night. I know it sounds like such a cliché, but it's so unbelievably true. I couldn't stop loving Janie even if I wanted to.

And she was going to be my wife.

_I just can't stop loving you_


	15. You Are My Life

_**Alright, it's really late here but i had to finish this LAST CHAPPY before i went to bed, and i had to post it. so HA! I did it! yay! ummmm..i know this is like a month late, i apologize! My JoMo Muse hasn't been cooperating..so i forced him to do so tonight and i got this chappy out..and i like how it turned out...**_

_**ummmm, i can't take credit for the ceremony/vows..they came from these two websites...**_

_**(vows: **_.**_) & (ceremony: _**.**_)_**

**_I only own Janelle Renee Hennigan (hee hee!) _**

**_R.I.P. Michael Jackson, to whom this fic was tributed...his music is a blessing to us, and i miss him dearly. _**

**_please leave a REVIEW because REVIEWS=LOVE! thanks to EVERYONE who has REVIEWED AT ALL! Y'all mean sooo much to me. You helped me get through writing this, and you inspire me to keep writing and to start new fics..without you, my writing would be unread and pointless. so thank you!  
_**

**_ENJOY this final chappy of You Are My Life_**

**_xoxoxo_**

**_Angel  
_**

* * *

_**Song by Michael Jackson**_

* * *

_**Chapter 15- You Are My Life**_

_once all alone_

_I was lost in a world of strangers_

_no one to trust_

_on my own, I was lonely_

_you suddenly appeared_

_it was cloudy before but now it's clear_

_you took away the fear _

_you brought me back to life_

John took a deep breath and smiled at Mike, his best man. "Calm down, everything is going to go without a hitch," he stated with a smirk. John nodded in agreement. "Get out there," Mike said as the huge doors to the hall opened and he walked down the aisle to stand beside the minister who was already in place.

John smiled as Mike walked down the aisle, Bailey had her arm looped through his. TJ came next, with Nattie on his arm. Punk and Melina came last. The flower girls, who were several of Janie's cousins came down the aisle followed by the ring bearer, another one of her cousins.

The traditional bridal march started and the doors opened again to reveal Janie, in a beautiful white dress with a lace bodice. John swallowed. She looked beautiful. She smiled a breathtaking smile at her soon-to-be husband. He smiled back as the minister told the crowd to "stand up for the bride please." Everyone stood as Janie, with her mother, seeing as her father was dead.

John and Janie kept eye contact the whole way until she was finally standing just below him. She turned and kissed her mother, who gave her hand to John. He helped her up the stairs and grinned widely. She resisted the urge to laugh as happy tears swelled behind her eyes.

"Hello and welcome! We're gathered together here in the presence of friends and family to celebrate the love with Janelle and John have for each other, to give social recognition to their decision to commit their lives and accept each other completely, to learn how to help and understand each other, to build a family, and together, to travel through life. If any of you has anything to say that might change their minds...they...don't want to hear it." the crowd chuckled and Janie rolled her eyes slightly at John, who had put that in there.

The minister continued with a good-natured smile, "however, they do want to hear form you, that you will always be their friends, and will always support and encourage them as they discover the commitment and dedication needed to make marriage work. And that is why you are here today."

_you are the sun_

_you make me shine_

_or more like the stars_

_that twinkle at night_

_you are the moon_

_that glows in my heart _

_you're my daytime my nighttime_

_my world_

_you are my life_

The ceremony continued. "Janelle, do you take John to be your wedded husband, to share your life openly, standing with him, in sickness and in health, in joy and in sorrow, in hardship and in ease, to cherish and to love, so long as you both shall live?" the minister asked, looking up at Janie. She smiled, happy tears threatening to fall again. John squeezed her hand. "I do." she answered, her voice not betraying her at all. John smiled.

"And John, do you take Janelle to be you wedded wife, to share your life openly, standing with her, in sickness and in health, in joy and in sorrow, in hardship and in ease, to cherish and to love, so long as you both shall live?" the same question was asked of him. "I do." he answered without a moment's hesitance.

"May we have the rings please?" the minister asked and little Carter stepped forward, making Janie smile. She was there when he was born. John took the ring and placed it on Janie's finger, his eyes locked with hers. This ring I give to you as a token of my love and devotion to you. I pledge to you all that I am and all that I will ever be as your husband. With this ring, I gladly marry you and join my life to yours." he said.

A tear slipped down Janie's cheek as she smiled.

_now I wake up everyday_

_with this smile upon my face_

_no more tears, no more pain _

_cause you love me_

_you help me understand _

_that love is the answer to all that I am_

_and I'm a better man _

_you taught me by sharing your love_

She took his ring and placed it on his finger. "I give you this ring as a symbol of my love for you. Let it be a reminder that I am always by your side and that I will always be a faithful partner to you. Let it serve as a visible and constant symbol of my promises to be with you as long as I live," she said. She pressed her lips together and smiled again.

The minister smiled. "John, you may kiss your bride." he said. John smiled as he pulled Janie to him gently, pressing his lips to hers. She wrapped her arms around his neck as they broke the kiss and pressed their foreheads to each others. John had never felt so complete. He had found his other half in Janie.

"Ladies and gentlemen, I am honored to present to you, for the very first time, Mr. And Mrs. Hennigan." the minister announced as John and Janie turned to their family and friends who were all cheering happily with congratulations.

_you are the sun _

_you make me shine_

_or more like the stars_

_that twinkle at night _

_you are the moon_

_that glows in my heart_

_you're my daytime my nighttime_

_my world _

_you are my life_

_~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~_

_**John's POV**_

I turned my head to the right and smiled. Janie smiled back at me, meeting my eyes. She was glowing with happiness, as I'm sure I was. She pressed her lips together and leaned in to kiss me. "I love you," she whispered. "I love you so much," I murmured against her lips before kissing her again. She pulled away and separated her hand from mine to wipe her eyes. I smiled slightly as I pulled her hand away from her face and padded the tears away with my thumb.

She smiled, "always taking care of me," she said with a strangled laugh. "That's what I vowed I'd do," I told her and it made her break down into tears again. "Shh," I murmured, pushing the armrest up so I could wrap my arms around her. She hid her face in the curve of my neck. "I'm sorry I'm so emotional," she muttered. I laughed, "don't apologize for that. If you weren't so emotional we wouldn't be here," I said. She nodded as she pulled back, "true," she said, pursing her lips and waggling her eyebrows. I laughed.

_you gave me strength_

_when I wasn't strong _

_you gave me hope when all hope is lost_

_you opened my eyes when I couldn't see_

_love was always here waiting for me_

I stared at her as she smiled at me. I glanced down at our interlocked fingers. Her small, delicate left hand in my bigger hand. I smiled at the gold band on her finger. It surely did signify so many things for us. It didn't just symbolize that she was my wife. It symbolized that our love was never-ending, like the circular shape of the ring.

But less wedding-related; it stood for how Janie gave me the strength I needed when I felt powerless and hopeless. She opened my eyes when I refused to see what was right in front of me. She was always at home waiting for me.

Every morning I woke up beside her, I woke up smiling. I didn't cry and neither did she, there was no more pain. She made me a better man, there was no doubt about that.

Janie was my sun and moon. My sky, my stars. My day and my night. She was my world. She was my everything.

She was my life.


End file.
